If you grew up with caregivers who were critical, emotionally unavailable, inconsistent or overwhelmed themselves, you likely learned early on how to adapt. Maybe that meant becoming easy, helpful or invisible. Maybe it meant being the emotional container for everyone else. Maybe it meant tuning out your own needs to keep the peace. You figured out how to survive - often by abandoning parts of yourself.
Therapy for Relational Traumas and Attachment Wounds in Los Angeles
Individual Therapy for Relational Traumas in Hermosa Beach and Los Angeles
If love felt inconsistent, you might always feel a little uncertain like you're waiting for the other shoe to drop. If you were often shamed and criticized, you might carry an inner critic that never lets up. If you were ignored, you might downplay your needs, so you don’t have to face the pain of them not being met again.
And here’s the thing: you didn’t choose those patterns. And you are allowed to outgrow them.
The way you relate to yourself was shaped in relationship with people who couldn’t always show up the way you needed
COUPLES THERAPY
We might be a good fit If...
You notice that you’re hyper-critical of yourself and when you think about it, it sounds eerily like the way someone once spoke to you.
We might be a good fit If...
You struggle to trust your own emotional responses and find yourself constantly questioning if you’re being “too much” or “not enough.”
We might be a good fit If...
You feel panicked, rejected or abandoned when your partner needs space. And you respond by pushing harder to resolve things right now because your nervous system doesn’t feel safe with distance or by shutting down.
We might be a good fit If...
You often choose emotionally unavailable or unpredictable partners, and part of you already knows it’s not an accident. Or you find yourself trying to “fix” or upgrade your partner not because you don’t love them, but because their imperfections trigger parts of you that you haven’t fully accepted.
We might be a good fit If...
You try to be the perfect partner/ friend/ child/ coworker: low-maintenance, adaptable, self-sufficient, and then you feel alone and silently resent that no one sees what it costs you.
We might be a good fit If...
You find yourself caught between two painful strategies: over-functioning to earn love or disconnecting completely so you don’t have to risk needing anyone. You’re the one who gives, fixes, anticipates, and then quietly wonders why no one ever seems to show up for you.
We might be a good fit If...
You wish your partner would just know what you need because asking makes you feel like a burden or unchosen or unworthy.
We might be a good fit If...
You’ve experienced emotional neglect, enmeshment, parentification or ongoing abuse and you’re ready to start working through the wounds.
Relational trauma can look like emotional neglect. Sometimes it looks like a parent who was physically present but emotionally absent. Sometimes it’s growing up in a household where your needs weren’t allowed or, worse, punished. And sometimes it’s the confusing mix of being both loved and hurt by the same people. It can also include experiences like enmeshment, parentification, manipulation or abuse. Whether the wounds were loud or quiet, healing them means stepping out of survival mode and learning to relate to yourself and others in a new way. A way that’s rooted in self-trust, emotional safety, and mutual care.
Learning to reparent your emotional world by creating space and compassion for the parts of you that had to grow up too fast, stay small or shut down to stay safe. These younger parts often take the wheel in adulthood by shaping how you protect yourself, how you connect, and how you expect to be treated. In therapy, we begin to notice when they’re in charge, and help your adult self step back in with clarity and care.
